Help! My Dad Retired from the Family Business Years Ago but Still Tries to Run It and It’s Causing a Lot of Problems

It can be difficult when a parent retires from their job within the family business but continues to act as if they are still in charge. They may make unnecessary demands or try to micro-manage things that are no longer their responsibility. This can cause tension and conflict among other family members who are trying to run the business smoothly. If you find yourself in this situation, it is important to set boundaries and communicate effectively with your parent. So, let’s discuss some tips for how to do that.

The “Unable to Let Go” Syndrome

Some people, be it a father, mother, or even another family member, who’s worked for long periods of time in a family business regard the company as part of their identity. It’s simply part of who they are and therefore, it’s not easy to walk away. It becomes even more difficult when handing the operation over to children, who don’t have all their years of experience.
One of the most agonizing experiences that any business faces is moving from one generation of top management to the next. The problem is often most acute in family businesses, where the original entrepreneur hangs on as he watches others try to help manage or take over his business, while at the same time, his heirs feel overshadowed and frustrated. Paralleling the stages of family power are stages of company growth or of stagnation, and the smoothness with which one kind of transition is made often has a direct effect on the success of the other. —Harvard Business Review
Unsurprisingly, this can easily lead to a father, mother, aunt, uncle, or even a cousin to hang around. Perhaps to the extent that he or she still continues to “run” the business, without the permission of their successors. He or she may make promises, enter into deals, or offer discounts that undermine the new authority of their successive family member(s). Of course, this can cause resentment, anger, frustration, and might also be the cause of unnecessary fighting and/or financial trouble.

How to Deal with a Parent Who Keeps Interloping in a Family Business After Retiring

Fortunately, if you’re in a situation where one or more of your family members has retired but still continues to interlope in the family business, there are steps you can take. First, you need to have a discussion with your parent about their role in the business now that they are retired. It is important to be respectful yet firm in this conversation. Explain to them that while you value their opinion, they need to respect the fact that you are now running the business. This means that they should not try to make decisions or give orders without consulting with you first. You may also want to set some ground rules about how often they can come into the office or participate in business meetings. It is also important to stay calm and avoid getting into arguments with your parent. If they continue to try and take control, it will only escalate the situation and make it more difficult to resolve. Instead, try to have a rational and calm discussion about the situation. If necessary, you may need to involve other family members or even a mediator to help resolve the situation. Additionally, it may be necessary to speak privately with any customers who aren’t completely clear about who is actually running the company and who makes the decisions. This could help in the future with communication and in other important areas. If you find yourself in this situation, it is important to set boundaries and communicate effectively with your parent. By doing so, you can hopefully avoid conflict and maintain a healthy relationship with your parent. Have you ever dealt with this type of situation? What would you do to resolve it? Please take a moment to share your experiences and thoughts so others can benefit from your input. Interested in learning more about business? Then just visit Waters Business Consulting Group.

Like this article?

Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Share on Linkdin
Share on Pinterest

Related Posts

If You Work Even When Your Not at Work You Need to Stop and Read This

Work, work, work, work. It’s a well-established entrepreneurial behavior. And, in the age of on-demand information and immediate connectivity, it’s only getting worse. Unfortunately, too many people are a part of an always-at-work culture. Sure, they love what they do. But, it causes burn out and just isn’t healthy. If you’re constantly working, even when you’re not at work, you’re not alone. So, read on to learn a few ways to effectively deal with it. A Different Look at the Always-at-Work Behavior We’ve talked about wasting time. And, in a very real sense, that’s what you’re doing when you’re working when you’re not actually at work. In other words, the fact that you’re not truly in the moment means you’re only cheating yourself and the others around you. Depending on the job and the employer’s expectations, which should be clearly outlined, employees who accept a job and commit to meeting those expectations need to accept that they are “on call” and be willing to answer communications. However, remember the old adage, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” Everyone deserves some time to disconnect. —Forbes.com Think about it for a moment. If you are constantly distracted by work, you’re effectively taking time away from family and friends because you’re not enjoying what’s going on. In fact, you don’t even need to be there since it’s not what’s capturing your attention. How to Prevent Workaholic Urges Now, it’s one thing to “know” there’s an issue but a totally different thing to do something about it. After all, you’ll have to fight through those feelings that push you into your always-at-work disposition. So, let’s take a look at some effective ways to prevent workaholic urges: Recognize there’s a problem. You’ve probably heard this a number of times. It’s unavoidably true. You must start by recognizing there is a real problem. Then, commit to make a change. Don’t beat yourself up too much if you slip now and again because that’s just part of the process. Ask for help from your team. You’ll need to enlist the help of your team to make real strides. Tell them to keep work at work. You’ll probably find they are happy to help out. Establish a set turn-off time. Another way to get away from the urge to work is to establish a set turnoff time. (A good time is when it’s time to cook dinner or sit down for dinner.) Learn to indulge in relaxation. Relaxation isn’t a bad thing. So, stop treating it like it is the end of the world because it isn’t. Find something you enjoy and take time to enjoy it. I am personally working on myself too! I recently took a break to Mexico with my 14 year old daughter to unplug. Guess what, I plugged in my lap top to work in the mornings and found myself working until noon on a few days! Not good! I actually felt a small amount of anxiety because of my actions. I am now working on a better plan for unplugging. How else do you get away from the urge to work all the time? What other methods and strategies do you use? Please share your thoughts and experiences by commenting! Interested in learning more about business? Then just visit Waters Business Consulting Group.

Read More »

Want to Make the New Year a Success? Avoid these People

The New Year will soon be upon us. And, the majority will make different resolutions. Usually, these are about personal goals — going on a diet, getting in shape, and spending more quality time with family and friends. But many of us will also include a few business goals on our lists. And, there certainly isn’t anything wrong with this. Of course, this comes with its own set of challenges. One of the biggest, is avoiding toxic personalities. Why Avoiding Toxic Personalities is So Difficult Okay, that’s great and it’s also all-too obvious. Who really seeks out toxic personalities? Well, no one does — at least not consciously. But, isn’t it strange how we all seem to attract crazy? Or at the very least, difficult. So, what is so difficult about avoiding bad personalities? The answer is complex. Boil it down to logistics and it becomes more clear. We simply do not have control over who comes into our lives. Unfortunately, not everyone pushes us to be better. Some people stop us from following our dreams or talk us out of taking a risk, and we don’t always realize that it’s happening. So it’s important to be aware and consciously choose who we spend time with, to limit spending time with toxic people —Success.com To an extent, we can avoid known bad personalities. But, even this becomes difficult in the workplace. Sometimes, there is no real choice. You must accept the situation and make the most of it. However that doesn’t mean you don’t have any options at your disposal. Personality Types to Avoid in Order to Succeed The fact of the matter is, you become a product of the company you keep. It is a long-proven phenomenon. That’s precisely why there’s so much advice about surrounding yourself with good people. They’ll have a positive impact on you. As a result, you’ll achieve more and adopt a better outlook on life. As Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” But, this means there are personality types you need to avoid, like the following: Micromanagers. This personality tops the list because it’s the type no one can stand. Sure, management is a good thing. But, when it’s repeatedly taken to a granular level, it becomes counterproductive. Worse yet, it causes others to become resentful and unmotivated. Learning to solve problems independently is far more valuable. Short-term thinkers. There is nothing wrong with having a short-term game plan to reach a goal. But, it should fit into a larger scheme toward an ultimate goal. Short-term thinking is good for the near future but it’s an obstacle to long-term success. Pessimists. Pessimism isn’t always a bad trait. In fact, when it’s useful we call it pragmatism. That’s a good thing because it helps us to avoid unnecessary risk. But a pessimist doesn’t see anything but downside. When this happens, it’s very hard to move forward confidently or at all. Big spenders. Spendthrifts are also a bad influence. They don’t take financial responsibility. And, the results are often bad. Of course, there are times when it’s okay to spend but constantly splurging is just a recipe for ruin. Which other personalities do you avoid? Which personalities are a real asset to entrepreneurs? Please, share your thoughts and experiences by commenting and joining the discussion! Interested in learning more about business? Then just visit Waters Business Consulting Group.

Read More »

What are the Pros and Cons of Giving Small Business Employees Holiday Bonuses

Small business employee holiday bonuses have their advantages and disadvantages. As with most kinds of incentives, it creates different scenarios that small business owners should be aware of before introducing them. As any entrepreneur knows, there are upsides and downsides to just about everything. So, let’s take a quick look at the most common pros and cons of giving small business employee holiday bonuses. Small Business Employee Holiday Bonus Cons We’ll start with the disadvantages. First, it creates unrealistic expectations. For instance, if you have a stellar year and profits are high, it’s only natural to want to reward your people. But this sets up an expectation for the following year, even if it’s a very poor one. Also, bonuses sometimes fosters unhealthy competition. In other words, it will cause some employees to up their game substantially, even at the expense of their teammates. Also, one person might exceed expectations so much, his or her performance could cost you a hefty tax bill. Your small business can’t operate successfully without the help of your employees, which is why it’s important to maintain a happy, focused workforce. Of course, giving your hardworking employees a bonus or raise can decrease turnover and boost staff morale, but these monetary rewards can easily take a toll on your business’s bottom line. —Intuit QuickBooks Speaking of taxes, giving out bonuses creates new tax implications for your small business. Of course, that’s not your employees’ problem but it will certainly cause you to think twice. Lastly, another downside of bonuses –specifically performance-based models — is the fact it might marginalize and/or demoralize those who aren’t eligible or simply do not perform as well as top producers. Small Business Employee Holiday Bonus Pros Now, let’s look at the benefits of giving small business employees holiday bonuses. Bonuses incentivize employees. On the flip side, overall employee performance will notably increase — probably enough to substantially benefit the company’s bottom line. Of course, that’s a terrific win-win scenario and one you’ll definitely strive to repeat as many times as possible. Bonuses help retain key staff. Bonuses are also a great retention tool, particularly for performance-based models. It helps to give employees more control over their earnings and hence, take ownership in the company. Plus, that extra earning power reiterates the fundamental attractiveness of the company itself. Bonuses instill responsibility. Bonuses are a powerful motivator, so much, individuals will likely take on more responsibility, even to the point of tackling tasks not in their job descriptions. For instance, a salesperson who personally picks up and delivers one or more orders when other team members are struggling to keep up or falling behind. What other pros and cons about giving employee bonuses would you add? Please share your thoughts and experiences by commenting! Interested in learning more about business? Then just visit Waters Business Consulting Group.

Read More »

Imagine Selling Your Business…

How Would Your Life Change?

You didn’t start your business just to stay busy—you built it to create freedom, security, and options for yourself and your family. Selling your business can be life-changing, but the real question is whether you’re intentionally building toward that outcome or simply leaving it to chance.

Sign up below for a free consultative session to learn what your business could be worth today and in the future! 

Thank you for your interest in learning what your business is worth. We will be in touch shortly.