I Took Over the Family Business but My Parents won’t Let Me Run It

You have taken over the family business. At least ostensibly. But, it appears that your parents (maybe one in particular), has yet to truly let go of the company. That is to say, your parents collectively, or mom or dad, are still running the day-to-day operations, even though they’re not supposed to do so any longer. It’s driving you crazy, and what’s more, it’s beginning to create a confusing situation among your employees. Worse still, you’re not getting the control and respect you deserve. So, what can you do?

Common Family Business Challenges

When a child or children take over the family business from their parents, it is not at all uncommon for the parents to stick around for a little while. However, if they continue with their normal presence and engagement, it can create a number of problems. First and foremost of course, is the fact that successors aren’t seen as true authority figures. But, that’s not all.

While business owners typically make more money by selling to a third party, many want to keep their companies in the family. ‘If it’s a growing and thriving business, it should appreciate and produce income for the kids,’ says Amelia Heath, a lawyer in Portland, Ore., with Davis Wright Tremaine. ‘If the kids are involved, then giving them the business can be a good choice.’ —Kiplinger

Because the children’s role has been marginalized, they don’t feel comfortable or empowered to make any needed changes. Obviously, the employee’s disposition at large will also be affected by this type of situation. In short, it creates an awkward and uncomfortable scenario that just can’t be tolerated.

How to Take Over a Family Business from Parents Who won’t Let Go

If you’re experiencing these types of circumstances, you’re probably very unhappy, to say the least. Though you appreciate your parents’ past and current contributions, you’re now the one that is supposed to be running the business. Even though they’ve passed it off to you, they’re still holding on to their previous roles. So, here are a few helpful suggestions:

  • Have “the talk.” While it’s either the last thing you want to do, or you’re eager to jump into it, you’ll have to have a firm yet caring discussion. Get the point across that you greatly appreciate all they have done and would also be equally grateful to help you out as you need it, but you must take on the position they’ve passed to you to honor their legacy. In other words, treat them with respect and gracefully allow them to transition out of the company.
  • Speak with your employees. Next, it will probably be necessary to speak to the employees in much the same way. That is to say, that you are now the one that is in charge of the business and they should look to you. Give them a little leeway with this, because if your parents are still even marginally involved, they’ll naturally feel obligated to listen to them. However, given a little time, the entire dynamic will change and the employees will respect your place as the head of the company.
  • Get all your vendors up-to-date. The same thing holds true for vendors. Because they have a long-standing relationship with your parents, they will also feel more comfortable doing business with your folks rather than you. Just as with the employees, this too will change over time.
  • Make necessary changes incrementally. Another way to make the transition go smoother is to hold off making any big changes in the short term. (At least, those things that can wait.) This way, your parents won’t feel as though they’ve been doing something wrong, or that you’ve been itching to making changes they’ve long resisted.

What other suggestions do you have? Please take a moment to share your thoughts and experiences so others can benefit from your perspective!

Interested in learning more about business? Then just visit Waters Business Consulting Group

Like this article?

Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Share on Linkdin
Share on Pinterest

Related Posts

Managers should Avoid these Phrases to Avoid Killing Employees’ Trust in Their Leadership

When it comes to the workplace, trust is key. Employees need to trust their managers in order to feel comfortable taking risks and be productive. Managers, in turn, need to trust their employees in order to delegate tasks and give them the freedom to make decisions. Unfortunately, many managers say things that damage this trust relationship. So, let’s discuss five of the most common phrases that managers use that kill employees’ trust. Words can Speak Louder than Actions Managers should avoid the following phrases in order to maintain a trusting relationship with their employees. Trust is essential for a healthy workplace and these phrases can damage that trust relationship. Employees need to feel comfortable coming to their managers with questions and concerns, and they need to know that their manager will be open and transparent with them. The employee-manager relationship is one of the primary components to a strong organizational structure. Employees rely on their managers for career development and guidance on how to improve their skills. One of the elements of a successful employee-manager relationship is trust. When the sense of trust is strong between an employee and manager, it adds efficiency to other elements of workplace productivity. —Houston Chronicle Small Business When managers use these phrases, it sends the opposite message. It makes employees feel unimportant and disregarded. It creates uncertainty and frustration, which leads to a lack of trust on the part of the employees. And that, of course, results in a negative impact on morale, productivity, and overall company culture — three poison pills that can cause actual, long-lasting damage. Five Phrases Managers should Avoid to Avoid Destroying Employee Trust We’ve all heard the age-old wisdom about sticks and stones breaking bones but words never inflicting harm. Of course, this philosophy is entirely contextual because we all vividly remember instances when words cut deep. While these phrases aren’t intended to insult or hurt, they nevertheless undermine your authority, respect, and relatability. So, avoid using the following phrases because they will slowly kill employee’s trust: “I’m the boss, I don’t have to explain my decisions.” This phrase is incredibly damaging to trust. Employees need to feel like they can come to their managers with questions and that their manager will be open and transparent with them. When a manager uses this phrase, it sends the message that the employee is not valued and that their opinion does not matter. It also makes the manager seem like they are hiding something. This can lead to employees feeling uncomfortable coming to their managers with questions or suggestions, which can hurt productivity and morale. “I’m too busy to deal with this right now.” This phrase often comes across as dismissive and unprofessional. It sends the message that the employee’s concerns are not a priority and that their manager is too busy to deal with them. This can make employees feel unimportant and disregarded. It can also lead to them feeling like they are not able to come to their manager with problems or concerns, which can hurt morale and productivity. “I’ll get back to you.” This phrase often comes across as ambiguous and frustrating for employees. Employees want to know what is going on and they want answers from their managers. When a manager says this phrase, it sends the message that the employee is being ignored and that their question is not important. It also creates uncertainty, which can lead to employees feeling anxious and stressed. “I’m not sure, let me check on that.” This phrase is often used as a way to avoid making a decision or taking responsibility. It sends the message that the manager is not capable of making decisions and that they are not in charge. This can make employees feel like they are not being taken seriously and that their concerns are not important. It can also lead to frustration and a lack of trust on the part of the employees. “That’s not my job.” This phrase communicates that the manager does not care about their employees or their job responsibilities. It sends the message that the employee is unimportant and that their job is irrelevant. This can lead to employees feeling unvalued and unmotivated. It can also cause them to feel like they are not able to come to their manager with questions or concerns, which can hurt morale and productivity. Which other phrases would you include in this list? Please take a moment to share your thoughts and experiences so others can benefit from your perspective! Interested in learning more about business? Then just visit Waters Business Consulting Group.

Read More »

Reconstruction Red Shirts Relay a Valuable Lesson Entrepreneurs Can Still Use Today

You may not believe it, but the experiences of the Red Shirts during the post-Civil War Reconstruction era provide a powerful lesson for today’s small business owners in recognizing when a cause is futile. Why? Well, the Red Shirts were a paramilitary group that fought against Reconstruction efforts in the South, often with overwhelming odds stacked against them. Their struggle, despite fierce resistance, ultimately failed to stop the sweeping societal changes brought by federal authority. For business owners, this history can highlight the importance of recognizing situations where their efforts are likely to result in little or no success, despite emotional or ideological investment. You see, sometimes, persistence can be misdirected, leading to wasted time, resources, and energy. Instead of relentlessly pursuing a failing strategy, business owners should focus on adaptive strategies, learning when to pivot or walk away from a failing investment. In today’s business environment,, just as with the Red Shirts, recognizing when a fight is unwinnable can prevent further losses. Entrepreneurs should focus on evaluating their goals, assessing market conditions, and knowing when to change direction before a venture becomes unsustainable. Resilience in business does not always mean continuing a doomed effort, but sometimes, recognizing when to change course entirely. Learning from the Red Shirts: When to Quit Let’s recap to get the most out of this analogy. The Red Shirts, a white supremacist paramilitary group active in the American South during the Reconstruction era, faced numerous setbacks and failures in their attempts to suppress black voting and maintain white dominance. While their actions were abhorrent, their experiences can offer valuable lessons for today’s small business owners about recognizing futile situations and knowing when to give up on certain pursuits. This is particularly difficult for entrepreneurs because these self-starting, self-reliant individuals often believe they can make any situation work. With enough determination, grit, positivity, and a willingness to push past obstacles, entrepreneurs can fall into the trap of pursuing futile endeavors. So, it’s super important to recognize when something isn’t worth the time and effort. Identifying Futile Endeavors Lack of support. The Red Shirts struggled to gain widespread support, even among white Southerners. Similarly, small businesses may find it difficult to sustain themselves without adequate customer base or investor backing. Opposition. The Red Shirts faced fierce opposition from both sides, residents of the North, and the South and federal forces. Small businesses may encounter obstacles such as competition, regulatory hurdles, or negative market trends. Limited resources. The Red Shirts often lacked the necessary resources, such as funding and manpower, to achieve their goals. Small businesses may face similar constraints, such as insufficient capital or a shortage of skilled employees. Now, here’s the real kicker. It’s not just about identifying when something is futile, it’s about knowing when to give up. That’s not an easy thing for any entrepreneur to do, but on some occasions, it’s not only entirely necessary but appropriate. Knowing When to Quit Persistent failure. If a business consistently fails to meet its objectives despite repeated efforts, it may be time to reassess the situation. This could involve re-evaluating the business model, target market, or even the viability of the venture. Exhaustion of resources. When a business has exhausted its financial resources or is unable to attract additional funding, it may be necessary to consider closing down. Negative impact. If a business is causing significant stress, financial hardship, or damage to relationships, it may be time to cut losses and move on. Learning from the Past While the Red Shirts’ actions were reprehensible, their experiences can provide valuable insights for small business owners. By recognizing the signs of a futile endeavor and knowing when to quit, entrepreneurs can avoid wasting time, money, and emotional energy on ventures that are not likely to succeed. It’s important to note that giving up on a business can be a difficult decision. However, sometimes it is the most prudent course of action. By learning from the past, small business owners can make informed decisions and increase their chances of long-term success. Want to Accomplish More? Do you want your company to grow faster and earn more while you spend more time with your family doing all the things you started your business to do? We can make that dream a reality. Give us 30 minutes and we will show you how to get your life back. Skeptical? Good! Put us to the test. You can call us for your free appointment at 480-636-1720, or, if you prefer,

Read More »